There are one or two topics that get trainers hot under the collar. My own pet peeve has always been the abuse by so many trainers of Albert Mehrabian’s work. If you don’t know it, it’s the 55% – 38% – 7% ratios for facial, tonal and verbal communication.
I wrote about this for Training Journal in July 2007 but frankly, the best way to learn what Mehrabian really means is to watch the wonderful three and a half minute video by Creativity Works on YouTube.
So with Mehrabian comprehensively dealt with …
The Myth of the Feedback Sandwich
The story goes like this:
If you want to give someone great feedback, first tell them the things they do well, then tell them what they need to do better, and then, to avoid them losing too much confidence; remind them of their successes. Voila: the ‘feedback sandwich’
Picture By SweetOnVeg
The feedback sandwich was a popular staple of management training courses when I was on the receiving end, in the early 1990s. It probably still is.
Round 2: The Feedback Sandwich is rubbish
Most trainers now, rightly, eschew the feedback sandwich. The argument goes like this:
All it is, is sugaring the pill. When you re-iterate the good stuff, they will forget the filling in the middle. It’s easier to focus on the good stuff and, anyway, we always remember the start of something and the end – that’s what I say in my Presentation Skills training.
And that is all very credible – if a little bluntly expressed. I think I remember hearing myself say that once upon a time.
Round 3: Rehabilitating the Sandwich
Let’s think about the psychology of good communication. After all, that is a pre-requisite for good feedback.
Before you can get any complex message across, you have to build a measure of rapport. When you tell me what I have done well, I will probably recognise some of it, feel pleased that you have too, and start to trust you a little bit. I am listening now.
So, when you have told me all the good news, I am listening hard. And, because I trust that you have observed my performance carefully, I will listen to what else you have to say. Don’t squander that: give me an evidence-based assessment of what I need to do differently to raise my performance to a higher level.
That can be quite a draining process, when done well. So I may need some help processing it. So that I don’t feel knocked back and alone, end our conversation by reminding me that, no matter how critical you have had to be about some aspects of my performance, you will continue to support me.
There’s the sandwich. But now, the last component is not sugaring the pill, but forming a base to go forward. The top is a nice tasty bun with seeds. The middle is filling and nutritious. The base is firm and supports the rest. It’s a burger; a feedback burger! *
Picture By SweetOnVeg
So here’s the deal
- Don’t cite the 55-38-7 rule without reading my article, watching the video or researching Mehrabian’s work properly and
- When you give feedback, pay attention to the stages of your communication process, and the needs of the person you are supporting.
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* Thank you to my friend, Leigh Grainger, for introducing me to the phrase ‘Feedback Burger’.